15 months

15 months of nothin' but fun!!!!! Ok well maybe that isn't entirely true but it's 98% true. We took our baby girl in for her 15 month check up and for those dying to know the arbitrary percentiles she falls in to I have them for you. She weighs a whopping 21.4 pounds (10-25%), her length is 29 7/8 inches (25-50%) apparently they can't just round up on these things! And her head circumference is 44.5 cm (10-25%). She's jumped up a little in her head size, her dad is so proud. Now maybe all the kids won't call her pin head. Ha.

Anywhoooo, the doctor said everything was fine. I don't think he was particularly happy about her facing forward in her car seat already, but he didn't try to put up a fight with us. I actually struggle with this a little only because I feel like if it's recommended then it's probably for a good reason so why wouldn't I do the best to keep my baby safe. Well we at least have her sitting in the middle of the backseat, that's a little safer anyway. She loves her new car seat by the way.

Her tantrums have increased 20 fold and we're told it only gets worse. Maybe we were just spoiled with a good baby in the beginning (after sleeping issues were resolved of course). I do have to say that her tantrums generally, and I use that word loosely, only last about a minute at the most. Overall she's a great kid.

Eating is so so. She's gotten more picky (my genes) and usually wants what we have on our plate even if it's the same exact thing. Her appetite is also sporadic which I hear is normal especially during the teething years. I was actually a little worried that she'd have dropped weight by the time her Dr.'s appointment came around but she had not. She's really pretty good at using a fork and spoon. However, just as crawling was easier than walking at first, using her hands are still a more efficient method for her.

We did a week long vacation just recently by visiting Jon's dad and step-mom at their cabin in northern New Mexico and then jumping the AZ border into the beautiful White Mountains for a few days of real camping. We had a blast at the cabin. We hiked every morning so the 4 golden retrievers could get their exercise. Hadley liked bossing the dogs around and did NOT like the doggie kisses. They all played well together though. Hadley slept well most of the time on our trip. Naps were a little tricky but night time was business as usual. We had to share a room with her and Jon and I did not sleep well. We discovered Hadley's a talker while she sleeps (yet my genes again). She loved playing in the dirt and throwing rocks. We visited some horses at the cabin and she was curious but not overly excited.


Playing in a stream near the cabin


While camping we were planning on sleeping in a tent but that didn't work out because we grabbed the wrong one. Luckily, my parents and grandparents both brought their trailers and met us up in the White Mountains so we ended up bunking with them. That went fine. Hadley again, loved playing in the dirt and rocks. There were a million wildflowers up there from all the rain that were about thigh high for her so she'd walk around hitting them all. She was a great camper and I think she'll love the outdoors just as much as Jon and I do. I was worried she'd be one giant mosquito bite but I don't think she got a single one. The weather was great in both places and it did rain which isn't so great for exploring during camping but was still a nice change of pace from the hot temps in Tucson.


Hitting all the wildflowers

She's walking everywhere. Just this week I feel like she's improved a ton in repeating words. I was a little worried about her language development but she's getting there. She knows 'hi,' 'eye,' 'dada,' 'mama,' 'oooo' for moo, 'uff uff' for doggies, and she's repeated various phrases just once and we've never heard them again. She's so curious and adventurous. Doesn't seem to be afraid of much. Doesn't like her teeth being brushed, but LOVES reading books. She'll bring us book after book after book to read. And we'll do that about 5 times a day. I'm ok with that because she likes books more than TV right now.


Playing with dirt

God is

To be able to answer the question, "Is God relevant?" I need to have some sort of picture of who God is. This task is a bit dangerous as it is "putting God in a box," but more than that it's difficult to define such a being. It would seem easier to define what God is NOT. But alas, I will attempt to outline the character of God for myself, in ways that I have experienced him. This is in no particular order.

God is loving.

God is faithful.

God is powerful.

God is merciful.

God is all-knowing.

God is all-seeing.

God is just.

God is jealous.

God is alive.

God is sufficient.

God is personal.

I could sit here another hour or more and probably add to the list. Next I need to be able to articulate how God has shown up in my life in these ways. This is more of a daunting task as I know there are times where I have dismissed, or clearly missed, him being present in my day to day activities. To be able to do this would communicate that God is relevant. I know in my heart and mind he is, but to communicate that to someone who doesn't know God is a whole different ball game.

Is God Relevant?

In church today, Glen started a new series titled, 'Lost'. After writing my long blogs on the parable of the sower I've been thinking a lot about the Jesus my life portrays. Do people see Jesus in my actions? Do they have a glimpse of a God who freely gives grace, who faithfully loves, and who powerfully lives?

My instincts say 'no'. I realize I'm usually harder on myself about personality issues and perhaps it makes me work that much more to become a better person. I don't often have people approach me about my spiritual journey. On the other hand it's not easy for me to initiate conversations about my spiritual journey or another's journey. This kind of delves into a separate issue for me, just being outgoing and approachable, but I digress.

Glen, and a book I'm reading UnChristian, both talked about what outsiders think of Christians. They think God is distant and not personal; God is not relevant. I began to wonder after hearing this, "If someone asked me those questions what would I say?" My answer...."I have no idea how to respond." I suppose I could come up with something and I would depend on the Holy Spirit to be a part of the situation. Unfortunately, I'd have to take some time to think it through. And so I will.

Hypocrisy pt 2

Most outsiders think that Christians are hypocritical and for good reason. I often struggle with this label though. People want or expect Christians to be real, authentic and genuine, and I agree we should be. So there are times in life where I say one thing and then do another for whatever reason. This makes me a hypocrite. I've done it, I still do it, and I know I will probably do it again. To be real I'm admitting I'm a hypocrite, so does that make me less of a Christian?

I understand these expectations come from the high standards that Christians are to live up to and the standards they so often, harshly and unfairly, push on others. If Christians expect outsiders to live up to the standards of Christ this is unfair. Even Paul says in 1 Cor. 5:12, "What business is it of mine to judge those outside the church?...God will judge those outside."

How do I reconcile being real to those outsiders watching me while still living up to the standards Christ has set up for us and as society expects us? I don't want to seem lazy in my pursuit of righteousness. I don't want to excuse my episodes of hypocrisy. I want those watching to know I don't claim perfection, I claim perseverance. I keep working towards the end result, to live up to what Christ has modeled for me. I know this is the best path.

In the presence of God

(I know I have a post to do about hypocrisy but I'm on vacation and I have other, more relevant, topics to write about.)

I did an internship at my church, working with the involvement pastor. One of his responsibilities and creations was a spiritual gifts class. Since I was his apprentice I was charged with becoming familiar with it and learning more about spiritual gifts and how God has designed His creation. Upon researching and studying I found a list created by someone on the ways people are drawn to worship. There were several different ways which were identified that people draw near to God. A few examples are: through music, through art, through intellect, through nature, through care giving. This is similar to those personality tests.

Anyway, to my point, I LOVE to worship God through nature; I'm a naturalist as the list names it. When I'm outside in nature, I see the wonders God has created. When I look at the ocean in its vastness I am in awe and realize, as much is possible, how big God really is. When I look up at the stars or into a telescope I see the artist in God. The tops of mountains are a display of His strength. To see cells in a microscope or watch animals live with what seems like hardly a thought, I see His perfection. I can watch streams flow peacefully and I know my God is a God of peace. I hear birds calling, elk bugling, and trees blowing and I can hear the voice of God. When I am in nature I am in the presence of God.

Sunday, yesterday, on our drive up to the cabin we drove through a canyon that was full of green plants and grey rocks. It was so intricately laid out as if each rock was placed by hand with much thought put into it. Being the monsoon season we climbed the winding mountain road in a thick white cloud and light rain. It was so beautiful and at the same time, a little frightening.

To the right was a sheer cliff and we could see nothing on that side. The fog had worked its way in between each blade of each leaf on the plants. It curled itself around the fingers of the jagged rocks. It filled the canyon with moist air. There was such a quietness about it, which is inexplicable. It was ominous yet peaceful. It was breathtaking and cold, powerful yet gentle. To me this cloud that surrounded every free inch of space in the canyon was like the presence of God.

The cloud seemed to swallow up the canyon below us, the ground around us, and the sky above us. When I think of the presence of God this is it. God swallows me up with His power and gentleness. He can fill me up, wrap His arms around me, and create a quietness in my soul that is unmatched. I can do nothing but stand in awe of Him. I regret not getting a picture of it, however I revel in the idea that no picture can capture the true beauty of what we saw and that it was a time for me to be in the presence of God.

Hypocrisy

This word has popped up a lot recently. It makes me cringe. I truly try to live an authentic life in everything I do. Yes, I will admit I have done things I didn't really want to do or I'm sure there have been times where I've said one thing and done another thing. I don't claim perfection in this. So this is my current wrestling with the issue.

I'm reading a book called UnChristian by David Kinnaman. Essentially, he shares his findings of lots of research done by the Barna Group. They surveyed 16-29 year olds on their perceptions of Christians. The book is a little dry as it discusses so many numbers, however the results are sobering. One of the first negative perceptions (and most of the information collected was negative toward Christians) was that they are hypocritical.

Just last night in our bible study we were talking about an instance where someone was driving with a K-Love sticker (a Christian radio station) on their bumper, flippin' another driver the bird. I'd say that's hypocritical. So we all laughed as we collectively agreed with the statement, "And that's why I don't put Christian bumper stickers on my car." We don't want to be held to that standard, not having the bumper stickers makes it easier for us to be jerks on the road. According to society, it's worse when a Christian flips someone off then when a non-Christian does it? What's the difference?

So why is it as Christians we are held to a higher standard? Do non-Christians really know the standards to which Jesus called us? Or are they basing this judgement on how WE tell THEM the so-called right ways of living? This ties in so closely with being judgmental.

I'll unpack this more later!

Indecisive

I know my blog background changed again, even after my little poll. I'm just trying things out.